We live in a culture that says it’s all about me and what I want. Do what feels good, follow your heart is the motto of the day. This is not new, it’s been around for as long as humans have been around. But is that what the Bible says we are supposed to be doing? Is putting ourselves first, the foundation of how we are supposed to make decisions in our life as disciples of Jesus? Being selfish is part of our human nature. It comes very naturally to put our own interests above those of others. You ever listen to someone talk and almost everything that comes out of their mouth is about their favorite subject...themselves. It’s all about I, I, I and me, me, me. Even if they are talking about a situation that involves others, it’s always from the perspective of how it affected them and how it made them feel. Some personalities are predisposed to this behavior, but that does not make it OK. Here’s a test you can use to see if you are doing this. Ask yourself: Am I always the victim...or hero, in every story I tell? Is it always about me? If we are putting ourself first in everything, we are being foolish and asking for trouble. James 3:13-16 “13 Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. 14 But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. 15 This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. 16 For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.” Those are harsh words. If you are driven by jealousy and selfishness, that is earthly, unspiritual and demonic. Every vile practice will follow you. I know that’s harsh, but there’s more.
The Bible has a lot more to say about this, and none of it is good. At least two of the 12 disciples had this selfish problem as well. They wanted to make sure they were in charge of the others. Mark 10:35-37 “35 And James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came up to him and said to him, “Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.” 36 And he said to them, “What do you want me to do for you?” 37 And they said to him, “Grant us to sit, one at your right hand and one at your left, in your glory.” That was a very selfish request. They wanted to be sure they were promoted over the other guys. What made them think that was an OK thing to ask? How do you think that went over with the other 10 disciples when they heard about it? Not too good. Mark 10:41 “41 And when the ten heard it, they began to be indignant at James and John. What James and John had asked for was the very definition of selfish ambition. They only cared about what was in it form them. They were not concerned about the other disciples. Once the argument started, Jesus called them over and told them the secret to becoming great in His Kingdom. Mark 10:42-45 “42 And Jesus called them to him and said to them, “You know that those who are considered rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. 43 But it shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, 44 and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. 45 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
Serving others is the only way to be considered great in the Kingdom. To be promoted by God, you must demote yourself. Philippians 2:2-8 “2 complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. 3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, 6 who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, 7 but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. 8 And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” As believers we are supposed to have the mind of Christ and walk in humility, taking the form of a servant, putting the interests of others above ourself. Now let me say this about that. This can be very difficult and cause major issues. Let’s say two people are in a close relationship, and one of them is trying to follow biblical direction and put others first...but the other one is still very selfish, always painting themselves as a victim and taking advantage of the person who is trying to follow Christ. This can be abusive. As a believer, you have to use wisdom. You are not obligated to continue relationships that are dangerous to you own mental health. God has not called you to be abused just for the sake of someone else’s selfishness. Being persecuted for Christ is a different matter altogether. Here are some more verses that talk about how we are to treat each other as believers living in unity.
Romans 12:9-10 “9 Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. 10 Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.” It should be a competition around here to outdo others in showing honor and putting others first. This makes conflict impossible. If I consider you more important than me and you consider me more important than you, it all works perfectly. 1 Corinthians 10:23-27 “23 “All things are lawful,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful,” but not all things build up. 24 Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor. 25 Eat whatever is sold in the meat market without raising any question on the ground of conscience. 26 For “the earth is the Lord's, and the fullness thereof.” 27 If one of the unbelievers invites you to dinner and you are disposed to go, eat whatever is set before you without raising any question on the ground of conscience.” We don’t think about meat offered to idols these days, so let me make it more relevant for you today. Don’t offend a brother who is trying to be nice by offering you dinner, by turning them down because they have a glass of wine with their meal and you don’t believe that’s right. Now, let’s be clear. I did not say to go smoke some crack with them. That’s a different issue altogether. Can you set aside being offended because they don’t believe the same way you do concerning Christian liberty? Remember the first part of the passage, “All things are lawful, but not all things are helpful.” You may have realized that for you it’s very dangerous to have alcohol because you couldn’t control it in the past. But that does not make it so for everyone else.
On the flip side, you should not push a glass of wine onto someone if they don’t seem interested in it. You have no idea what their past has been or what brought them to that decision. The idea is the same for both sides, prefer your brother, and take your lead from them. Do not push your Christian liberty or lack thereof onto someone else. It’s not “My way or the highway.” 1 Corinthians 13:5 “Love does not insist on it’s own way.” Remember...It’s not all about you. It’s not just the world’s culture that teaches “It’s all about me.” The church has adopted this mentality as well. One thing we like to do is make the Bible about us. Here’s what I mean. When we read a verse in the Bible, we immediately try to figure out how we fit into the story and how we can benefit from it. Because that’s how it’s been preached in church. Here’s a classic example. The story of David and Goliath. You remember that one, right? The Philistines are lined up for battle against the army of Israel. Every day the giant Goliath, who was about 9ft tall, went out and shouted at Israel intimidating them. He said if anyone could kill him, the philistines would surrender to Israel. The problem was that everyone in Israel was scared of Goliath. Well along comes little David the shepherd boy, who gets angry that Israel would allow this Philistine to defy the army of the Living God. So David goes down to face Goliath and says this: 1 Samuel 17:45-47 “45 Then David said to the Philistine, “You come to me with a sword and with a spear and with a javelin, but I come to you in the name of the Lord of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied. 46 This day the Lord will deliver you into my hand, and I will strike you down
and cut off your head. And I will give the dead bodies of the host of the Philistines this day to the birds of the air and to the wild beasts of the earth, that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel, 47 and that all this assembly may know that the Lord saves not with sword and spear. For the battle is the Lord's, and he will give you into our hand.” Of course, David kills Goliath and everyone in church shouts because the pastor preaches that whatever you are facing in your life right now, whatever your Goliath is...you can defeat him. You will be a victorious child of God. He just put you in the story as David, having the victory over the enemy. That sounds great. But, here’s the problem. You are in the story all right, but you are not David. You are the Israelite army cowering on the sidelines. Jesus is the David character. He has defeated the enemy... and because of that you don’t have to be afraid any longer. You are on the victorious side, but not because of what you did. It’s because of what Jesus did. Do you see the difference? If you begin to see yourself as the hero in the Bible stories, it will give you a false sense of who you are, who God is and what your place is spiritually. Here’s another example we hear all the time. Mark 4:35-41 “35 On that day, when evening had come, he said to them, “Let us go across to the other side.” 36 And leaving the crowd, they took him with them in the boat, just as he was. And other boats were with him. 37 And a great windstorm arose, and the waves were breaking into the boat, so that the boat was already filling. 38 But he was in the stern, asleep on the cushion. And they woke him and said to him, “Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?” 39 And he awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, “Peace! Be
still!” And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. 40 He said to them, “Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?” 41 And they were filled with great fear and said to one another, “Who then is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?” Did you see the reaction Jesus had to them panicking in the storm. He rebuked them for their lack of faith. But what ends up being the popular thing to teach about this story? It’s that is Jesus calmed the storm for the disciples, so He will calm the storm...for you. It becomes all about us not having to weather the storms of life, with faith. The theme is that, Jesus will take away anything that is causing us to panic. But was that the point of this passage? No it was not. Let’s look at another passage that tells a very similar story. Psalm 107:23-30 “23 Some went down to the sea in ships, doing business on the great waters; 24 they saw the deeds of the Lord, his wondrous works in the deep. 25 For he commanded and raised the stormy wind, which lifted up the waves of the sea. 26 They mounted up to heaven; they went down to the depths; their courage melted away in their evil plight; 27 they reeled and staggered like drunken men and were at their wits' end. 28 Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress. 29 He made the storm be still, and the waves of the sea were hushed. 30 Then they were glad that the waters were quiet, and he brought them to their desired haven.” The very same calming a storm scenario was played out in the old testament, but the point was that God is in control of the wind and waves. The reaction of the men in the storm was the same as the disciples, but if we connect these passages, we can
see that the reason that Jesus calmed the storm in the Mark passage was to show that He was God. Mark 4 is a reenactment of Psalm 107. The disciples would have known the Psalm 107 passage, and that is why they ask this question among themselves. Mark 4:41 “41 And they were filled with great fear and said to one another, “Who then is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?” Jesus calmed the storm to show that He had power over wind and waves...He was God. He did not calm the storm just so the disciples could have their problem removed. Stop thinking of yourself as the main character of Bible stories. The bible is not about you. The bible is about God wanting a family and all He has done to make sure He has one. You are not the hero, Jesus is. The church has encouraged this “me” centered theology through “worship” music as well. How many songs have we sung in church that talk about us and what we are going to do, instead of about God and what He has done? I’ve heard it put like this. Let’s say I want to give praise my wife, because I love her. So I write her a song. The lyrics say things like, I love you, you make me feel appreciated, I feel like I can be myself around you, I am in awe of you, I need you, I want you. That may have the appearance of praise, but it’s not centered on who she is and what she has done. It’s centered on me and how I feel about what she has done. How it benefits me is all I’ve talked about in the song. I didn’t say one thing about her or her character.
But how about if I turn it around and use lyrics like this: You are beautiful, you are kind, you are intelligent, you are creative, you are thoughtful, you are selfless. Does that sound like I’m praising her now? Yes, it does. This is why we should often include some old hymns. They are God focused. We need to sing about God’s power, God’s love, God’s grace. How that makes us feel is secondary. Music is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to churches unintentionally creating selfish christians. We have made church so user friendly that we decide where to join based on this question. What’s in it for me? Does it have the music I like? Does it have something my kids will like? Because I don’t want to have to make them go. Does the service only last an hour? Is it comfortable? Do they preach that God will calm all the storms in my life? Me, me, me. None of these things should determine where we attend church...because it’s not about us and what makes us happy. It’s about Jesus and what makes Him happy. You should pick a body of believers to connect yourself to, based on the spiritual gift that God has given you and where He wants you to put it to use. If you have a gift that is not currently in operation at a church, perhaps God wants you to serve Him with your gift where it’s currently missing. For example, we could use some musicians and more singers around here. We will need more children’s teachers very soon. That is how we make what we do at church a “worship” service. We come to bring our worship to God. Our worship is much more than singing. It’s about selflessly serving with our gifts, giving generously, for the benefit of those in the church who might be struggling. It’s about loving your neighbor as yourself.
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