Have you ever been told you talk too much? Maybe you’re thinking that about me right now. Maybe you’ve been in a conversation with someone and your only contribution was three “thats awesome”, two “thats great” and one “wow, that’s crazy.” That person wasn’t really interested in talking with you, they just wanted to talk. Anyone would do. Their behavior has nothing to do with you, that’s just the way extroverts are wired. They get energy by engaging with people. Introverts are the opposite, they get their energy by being alone. The challenge is when an extrovert has cornered an introvert and starts talking. The longer they talk the better they feel...but the worse the introvert feels. Being aware of the potential issues that it can cause is very beneficial to us as believers. We are to honor and prefer our brothers and sisters over ourselves. So if your nature is to be extraverted, before you begin your conversation, know who you are talking to. Talking too much can be a problem and we are warned about it in scripture. Most ruined relationships are the result of something someone said, not what they did. Proverbs 10:19 “When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent.” Proverbs 21:23 “Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.”
Proverbs 13:3 “Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life; he who opens wide his lips comes to ruin.” The root problem is explained in the third chapter of the book of James. James 3:2-12 “2 For we all stumble in many ways. If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to bridle the whole body as well. 3 Now if we put the bits into the horses’ mouths so that they will obey us, we direct their entire body as well. 4 Look at the ships also, though they are so great and are driven by strong winds, are still directed by a very small rudder wherever the inclination of the pilot desires. 5 So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire! 6 And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell. 7 For every species of beasts and birds, of reptiles and creatures of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by the human race. 8 But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison. 9 With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; 10 from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way. 11 Does a fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and bitter water? 12 Can a fig tree, my brethren, produce olives, or a vine produce figs? Nor can salt water produce fresh. There is so much to be said here about how we ruin relationships with others and ruin our own life by what we say. Are you building others up or are you tearing them down? Let’s look at some more verses.
Proverbs 18:21 “Life and death is in the power of your tongue.” Ephesians 4:29-30 “29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.” 1 Peter 3:10 “10 For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit;” Extroverts can cause problems by talking to other people, but if you’re an introvert, there is an even greater danger for you. The challenge is that we talk just as much as the extroverts, but to ourselves. Did you realize that you are the person you talk to more often than anyone else. And this can be a big problem. Wether you realize it or not, you constantly carry on conversations with yourself, in your mind. Studies show that this self-talk occurs at a rate of about 1,300 words per minute. We have to examine if what you're saying to yourself reflects the truth of God’s word or if you have accepted a lie from the enemy. You can destroy your life and spiritual growth by your words. What are we saying to ourselves and about ourselves? So like I said earlier, our words are just the manifestation of the real problem. We have to dig deeper to get to the root of the issue and begin to understand that our words are the result of something deeper. Matthew 15:18 “18 But the things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.”
What’s going out of your mouth is coming directly from your heart and mind. We have to get control of our thoughts if we are going to attempt to get control of our words. This is how our brains work. When we think the same things over and over, our brain is designed to make a solid path so that thought is easier and faster the next time. This is how we are able to learn to do things and remember them faster the next time we need to do them. However, this design can work against us when we consider negative thought patterns. Essentially, every time you think about something, you make connections within your brain that make it more likely you’ll head down that same thought path again and soon. So, when you always think things like: “I can’t do this”, “ I don’t deserve this”, “I’ll always be this way” or “Am I really saved?” pretty soon you’ll be hearing that a lot more often in your head. Your brain behaves as though you’d like to access that thought quickly and makes a path for you to do so. However, “I can’t do this” is not the most helpful thought to think on repeat, especially when you’re trying to be obedient to God. Our thoughts are formulated long before they became part of our speech. They generally come from what other people think and say about us. We want them to like us so we accept their ideas of who we are. But as believers, we do not find our identity in the approval of other people, our identity is found in Christ. Your value is not determined by the opinion of people. Your value is based on God’s opinion of you. So, let’s see what God says about you.
1 John 3:1-2 “See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him. 2 Beloved, we are God's children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is.” God said He loves you so much, that He wants you to be called His child. And at the return of Jesus we shall be like Him. Ephesians 1:3-5 “3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, 4 even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love 5 he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will,” You have been adopted into God’s family. Which means you were chosen. You were not just randomly born into this family of God. You were chosen despite everything you would do, despite everything you would think and despite everything you would say. God knew you completely before He chose you...and He still chose you. Ephesians 2:8-10 “8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”
God created you for a specific purpose. He has a specific job for you to do in His kingdom expansion plan. That’s why He made you part of His family. 1 Peter 1:18-19 “18 knowing that you were ransomed from the futile ways inherited from your forefathers, not with perishable things such as silver or gold, 19 but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot.” The price He paid to make you His child was a heavy one. We were slaves to sin and death. The ransom note left by sin required the price of blood for our return. God ransomed us by the perfect blood of Jesus. 2 Corinthians 5:16-17 “16 From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. 17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” So, who are you according to the Bible? You are called a child of God because you have been adopted into God’s family...You are a chosen child of God. He chose you specifically. You are a redeemed, extravagantly loved, brand new created masterpiece of His own choosing. Any thoughts that come to you that are not in agreement with this are not from God and you need to recognize where they came from. They came from the enemy and you should not join with him and agree. Thinking about ourselves the right way and focusing our mind on what God says about us is basically preaching to ourselves. That’s why I say it’s not enough to just come and listen to me once a week. You have to keep your mind full of the word of
God. When the Bible talks about meditating on God’s Word, preaching to yourself is what It’s talking about. One of the first times the Bible mentions meditation is in Joshua. Joshua 1:8 and it reads, “Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.” In these verses, the focus of the meditation is on the words of Scripture. The Psalms also mentions meditating God’s unfailing love Psalm 48:9 "We have thought on Your lovingkindness, O God, In the midst of Your temple.” God’s works and all his mighty deeds Psalm 77:12 “I will meditate on all Your work And muse on Your deeds.” God’s precepts and his ways Psalm 119:15 “I will meditate on Your precepts And regard Your ways.” Meditation is the practice of saying something over and over until it becomes your natural first thought concerning that topic. When a difficult situation comes against you, what is your first thought? Is it “What am I going to do?” Or is it, “If God is for me, who can be against me?”
Do you struggle with words to yourself? If you do, do they take you down a path that’s hard to recover from? Do you believe that you’re going through something so bad that gives you a reason to be down on yourself? I know it can feel that way sometimes, but I believe today will help you know how to turn to God who can turn things around. Here is a verse with a question to memorize that will bring you back. Psalm 42:5 “Oh my soul why are you downcast?” This is the question the Psalmist asked himself when his thoughts went the wrong way. But Psalm 42 doesn’t stop with the question of being downcast, the psalm continues... Psalm 42:5 “Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him For the help of His countenance.” There is no reason for us to be downcast, we should be praising God, because He has a different opinion of you that is not based on your past! It doesn’t matter what your family past is or even what happened to you this morning. So how do we reverse directions in our mind when we start having negative self thoughts? Here are a few steps to get you started changing your thoughts: 1. Ask yourself: Is what I’m thinking agreeing with the truth of God’s word?
If it doesn’t: Don’t let those thoughts continue to run through your mind unchecked. Notice your negative thought loop, and then mentally call it out every time you realize it.
Memorize Scripture to meditate on to replace your negative thought loop with truth. As you meditate on and repeat that Scripture you will begin to rewire your mind.
You can start by using this passage that tells you how much God thinks about you. Psalm 139:17-18 “How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How vast is the sum of them! 18 If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand. When I awake, I am still with You.” Can you number the grains of sand at the beach? No, That’s how many thoughts God has about you. If you still wonder if you are valuable to Him, just consider the 23rd Psalm. Psalm 23 “1 The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. 2 He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters. 3 He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake. 4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. 5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You have anointed my head with oil; My cup overflows. 6 Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.” If the Lord is your shepherd, you will want for nothing. He will lead you towards righteousness. You don’t have to fear evil,
even when you’re walking through it’s territory. The rod of the Good Shepherd is always there for your protection. He is actually preparing a table for you to celebrate right in front of your enemies. You are anointed and your blessings overflow! The goodness of God is running after you all the days of your life!
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